October is Infant Death Awareness Month

2 years!

I cannot believe that 2 years has passed. Yet, it seems like just yesterday that Aria died. It is a moment I would like to forget. However, I could never forget my first baby girl.

Happy 2nd birthday my punk rock girl.

As we wake up in the morning

and your not here to see,

we grasp for some reality...

that our dreams can never be.

W

e'll imagine what the day would bring,

if only you weren't gone.

You'd run and laugh, and jump about,

we'd sing the birthday song.

You should be here today,

excited as can be...

Sifting through the toys and wrap,

bursting forth with glee...

We'll do our best to make it through,

this day we meet with dread.

We'll do this all for you, my love...

on this road of grief we tread.

So on this day... my precious daughter,

You're birthday number two...

your in our hearts and in our thoughts

....as we send our love to you.

© Sharon Kivisto

Wow- 4 babies in 3 years.....

When people ask how many children I have, I respond 4. 3 that are living. I will always remember the child I had but will never have.

Aria 10-11-08 - may you be at peace cause I may never be.

Life moves forward even when a part of you is missing.

It is amazing to think that if Aria was here, she would be the same age as Aurora.

Athena is 6 months old and Aurora is 1 and 1/2 year old.

As time passes.......

I look back and can't believe the amount of time that has passed. I think back to laying in the hospital in Oct saying, Dr. I really hope that Athena is not born on the same day as Aria! Thankfully, Athena came 1 week prior to the birth/death date of Aria.

I am not sure individuals who never experienced the loss of a baby or experienced a difficult pregnancy can understand the pain, fear and grief of the situation. Athena does not take the place of Aria. However, Aria made me realize how lucky I am to have Athena and how I cannot take her or Cole for granted.

With that being said, it is incredible that the statement, "you are pregnant" can be so bittersweet.

There are so many people blogging on here who have experience loss after loss with the added difficulty of conceiving. My heart goes out to you all.

We often think about you: Tristan's Mom.